The Daily Mock
a man stands in front of a storage unit with a box that reads tax cuts

New Tax Cuts this Year Means Americans Can Finally Afford Storage Units to Live In

Topeka, KS —Farmer Richard Sparks has been a lifelong Republican voter and didn’t see a reason to change when Trump ran.  As a small-time farmer, he needed someone who truly understood what it was like to have money troubles.  Affording even a place to live had become difficult for much of middle America.

“Well, the crops would come in,” stated Mr. Sparks, “and then I would have to pay all the seed bills and labor.  Then there are tractor repairs, land rental, and mortgage bills.  I didn’t know how we were going to make it.”

Mr. Sparks thanks God that Mr. Trump is now his president.  Once he lost his farm, his family could finally afford to live in a storage unit.

Different Sizes For Different Families

“The Tax cuts really saved my family,” Mr. Sparks revealed.  “I thought we were going to be living out of my truck.”  Instead, thanks to President Trump’s tax plan and tariffs, Mr. Sparks can afford the storage unit of his dreams.  With a family of eight, including Great Aunt Bess, he needed something a little larger.

The twenty by twenty storage unit fit the bill perfectly.  For meals, the propane hot plate provides all the family needs and doubles as an ambient heat source in winter. “I was able to buy the heat plate with my part of the bailout,” confirms Mr. Sparks.  He deserves every bit of it.

There are many sizes still available in the storage unit market.  Those with smaller families can get by on a five-by-five unit, while large families like Mr. Sparks need just a little bit more space.

How The Tax Cuts Helped Farmers

Not only are the tax cuts providing much-needed income to job creators, but it also gives them the ability to buy back their own stocks.  Many have evolved from job creators to shareholder creators.  And more money in their pocket means that the common farmer has more money out of his.  It’s the ideal situation for middle Americans.

In the future, Mr. Sparks is hoping that capital gains taxes also come down so he can dream about what that would be like if he could ever afford any retirement stocks.

Pssst….

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